Saturday, February 16, 2008

The Story of Sweet, Little Alfonzo

One day, back in the day, there was a sweet, little monkey named Alfonzo. Alfonzo was orphaned after his family was attacked by another clan of monkeys who mistakenly thought Alfonzo's clan had stolen their banana stash. Alfonzo survived by by curling up in a hairy, little ball in a hollowed out tree as he waited out the great battle that raged around him. Alfonzo finally came out of his tree-hole to find everyone he knew strewn about the forest in a bloody mess of squished-bananas, and assorted monkey parts. After he dried his tears and ate some depressing banana mess, he decided to set out to find his new home. Alfonzo wandered the forest and jungles of the world searching for monkeys who would accept him for who he was and what he loved. After Alfonzo's parents were killed, he began to comfort himself in the only way he knew how: holding his wee-wee in his mouth. Everytime Alfonzo found a new family, he was immediately expunged from their presence after they discovered his socially unacceptable habit. Soon Alfonzo realized that there were no monkeys left in the world who would accept him for who he was. It was this realization that helped him realize that his place was with a new sort of monkey: the less hairy, slightly smarter, clothes wearing human monkeys that he had only heard about in stories. So Alfonzo finally found a home in a beautiful place called the zoo. It was here that his newly acquired vice was not only accepted, but praised. And it is there that Alfonzo lives to this day, hanging on a fence, wee-wee in his mouth, thinking of the past and the crazy path that led him to where he is now.

1 comment:

david said...

That was touching. Tender, even.